I am beginning to think my aversion to loss is justified in RPGs. Quoting Rickard Elimaa, "Default is failure, success is fought for" : this horizon is where everything goes and sinks. You end up storing healing pots instead of watching sunset by the pond with someone you love. If peace was all about the next war, that would be a very sick peace.
Is there a psycho social reason to this obsession with success, like power fantasy escapism ? Does it have to do with "character advocacy", a concept I don't see clearly ? I understand it's important that the game world respond to characters' actions. But why the can/can't ? That seems to me hardly meaningful.